Australian Government Set Strict Guideline And Convention For Short-Cutting Of Words

 July 18, 1938

News in a flash—The Government of Australia set the sole guideline and convention for short-cutting and slanging of every single verb, noun, and words in general. Every word that exists may be shortened by adding "ie" after the first syllable and dropping everything else, thus, "Aussie" for Australian, "Footie" for Football, "breakie" for breakfast, and so on. A "y" instead of "ie" will suffice the short-cutting of names of places, thus, "Brissy" for Brisbane, "Melby" for Melbourne, "Tassy" for Tasmania and "Newy" for Newcastle. Anyone in Australian jurisdiction that don't adhere to this convention is subject to face the repercussions of the Anti-Australian Act. It is worth noting that the word "selfie," which the world largely patronizes is a product of the said act.