Did you kill the golden goose and you're scouring the job ads for a new one? Are you a good for nothing bum looking to be employed for a change? Are you fresh off your much celebrated commencement and for some reason don't feel like unemployment is your cup of tea? If your answer to one of these is yes, then you came to the right place. If your answer to two of these is yes, then you must be some kind of an imbecile, but you came to the right place. If your answer to all three of these is yes, then it is only fitting that your ill existence, an abomination of the most immense kind no less, must cease at once! But then, you came to the right place.

Finding a new job is a very enjoyable process. With the job market so plentiful, employers are practically begging to rally every single ounce of your consideration to apply for their jobs. It is our duty to qualify these jobs, not only to see if they fall on our niche, but also to see if these employers are good enough for their ads to deserve a brief glance right before they make a beeline for the back burner. If you just got off a bad employment, your top priority is not to fall in the same pit that houses the bad experiences, lousy pay and inconsiderate working environments. And we don't want to sweat it out on a consistent lengthy and daily basis either. Don't you think our forefathers have fought enough to free us from those chains?

We all want a place where we can spend the necessary time to mood up first without being judged. Some people like to maintain a daily 45-minute coffee ritual before kicking off the day with a pressure-free amount of toilet time and subtly ensued with a '20-minute or so' stimulating exchange of pleasantries with esteemed colleagues. If the company isn't open to diversity like that, you should not hesitate to threaten them on taking your talents elsewhere. You both know whose loss it's going to be and it isn't yours.

In today's time, online job boards are the primary source of job ads (You may also check the newspaper like they do in caves). Each job ad site works differently but most of them, if not all, provide a search field where you can type keywords. Or in layman's terms, a box thingy where you can write what you like. Type a word or a few pertaining your desired job such as, "easy one for the lazies", or "high salary and close to home". You may find hundreds of results after you hit the enter key. This is where you go through each of them to assess their suitability against your demands.

When you find that job, there's a really good chance that you're the only one who found it and let alone interested. Take your time and search for better ones, you never know what's still out there. When there's no more doubt, apply to that job by clicking on the "Apply" button. Some ads make it hard for you to apply so don't bother if their process is too time consuming. It's a good representation of how awful a company is. If they posted an email address, send your application with your attached resume to that email address.

Expect the company's representative to contact you soon, but do allow them a reasonable amount of time as they negotiate their everyday busy schedules. As you may also realize, these representatives must be pretty "diverse” as well. You don't however compromise your value as their future asset so give them a good 48-hour turnaround time. If they call after the 48-hour window, tell them—in the most spiteful of tones, that you're not interested and that you have moved on. If they come to beg and you are able to muster enough generosity, you may grant them a short interview.

Provided that they don't blow their chances with you, you could at least turn up for a final interview. When you do, do not forget that despite their keen interest, the burden of proving one's worth is still on your shoulders and you must sell yourself to the employer. Be careful playing your leverage especially when you get to the point where you divulge that 3 more sizable companies are on the wings, patiently waiting for your signature. With emphasis, simply request that you receive the offer right after the interview, as it would not make sense to repeat your travel when you are already there, ready to take care of business. Knowing that you’re kidding yourself and you're never going to get another shot like it, sign any initial offers as soon as they hand it and ask questions later.